Her collective gender have spent four entire decades tirelessly proclaiming their desire and innate ability to earn an income themselves, and the same time ensuring such laws as Ms. Moore has now used are protected and left firmly in place so they are free to leech money from men and avoid the slightest need to do any such thing.

One of these acions is bullshit. It’s time our compatriots decided which.

Photo by Dolphin

Text © 2009, The Loquacious Limey
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Mel Gibson divorce is just added proof

Jon Liebman, of Brillstein Entertainment Partners, who work with Brad on his projects, says Brad’s production company ‘Plan B’ has “expressed potential interest in the story.”

“Like so many people worldwide, Plan B has been incredibly moved by the story of the Chilean miners and their families,” Jon tells People.

And Brad’s not playing games – Edgardo Reinos Lundstedt, a lawyer who works with the miners, recently told the Chilean newspaper ‘El Mercurio’ that people at ‘Plan B’ had made his clients an offer ‘in the millions.’

But don’t get the popcorn just yet – Liebman was quick to point out that “There have not been any serious discussions.”

But if Brad does make the film it should be good – Plan B also made the Daniel Pearl drama, ‘A Mighty Heart’ [which co-starred Angelina Jolie,] ‘The Time Traveler’s Wife,’ with Eric Bana, and the unbounded glut of romantic treacle that was ‘Glee’ producer Ryan Murphy’s ‘Eat, Pray, Love,’ with Julia Roberts and James Franco.

Personally, I don’t think the miners could get their story told by anyone better. But do you think Brad is the right man for the job or should someone else, like perhaps Steven Spielberg make this film?…

Photo by: T. P. Shulz

Text © 2009, The Loquacious Limey
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Brad Pitt planning film about Chilean miners

The movie tells the true story of Aaron Ralston who became trapped in Utah’s Blue John Canyon when a huge boulder fell on his arm. After six days of trying to escape the 28-year old hiker amputated the arm with a blunt knife and thus survived.

And the amputation is so realistic, at the premiere at the Telluride Festival on September 3rd two people fainted. Three more followed at the Toronto Festival on September 12, and one at the ‘Mill Valley Festival’ screening.

“I started to feel like I was going to throw up,” Courtney Phelps, who caught a recent ‘sneak-peek’ screening tells the Times.  “So I went to the bathroom and I started feeling dizzy and my heart was racing.”

The paramedics found Phelps passed out on the floor.

“I have never had an experience like this,” she said. “I’m a TV producer. I know this stuff isn’t real.”

And while the buzz from such stories makes priceless PR, the film’s studio, Fox are having trouble deciding how to promote it without being seen as exploiting the gore over the story.

“I would prefer that people not pass out — it’s not a plus,” Fox’s co-president, Stephen Gilula told reporters. “We don’t see a particular publicity value in it.”

While it took Aaron almost an hour to sever the arm, the movie shows it in minutes. But those minutes are hard on the nerves. Very close camera work, snapping of bones and plenty of close-ups.

“I’m almost looking into the camera at times, and it feels like I’m talking to the audience,” says James Franco. “It’s a very intimate experience. When you go to a horror movie you know the characters are expendable, so you don’t care at this level.”

Loosely adapted from Ralston’s 2004 autobiography ‘Between a Rock and a Hard Place,’ and directed by ‘Slumdog Millionaire’ chief Danny Boyle, critics are suggesting ’127 Hours’ could be Oscar material. And they may right – Boyle won eight of the gold men for ‘Slumdog’ in 2009.

Described by Fox’s VP, Gilula as “the most empathetic experience I’ve ever seen,” the movie opens on Friday in New York and LA, with more cities added over the next few weeks.

My money says this is created PR and untrue, but will you go and see it? And do you think you could faint?…

Photo: David Shankbone

Text © 2009, The Loquacious Limey
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James Franco film, 127 Hours draws melodramatic response

The 16-year old is apparently in talks for a lead role in a remake of the splendidly stupid 1989 comedy ‘Bill & Ted’s Excellent Adventure.’ But producers are having a hard time finding a co-star so desperate they’d agree to play second-fiddle to Justin as ‘Ted.’

“Justin’s role in this project is a given, but the movie’s held up by finding the right kid to play Bill,” a source told the Spy. “The producers are torn between casting an unknown and finding another teen actor who can share top billing.”

For those too young to have savored this iconic movie when it debuted in February of 1989 it tells the the story of two high-school dorks and atonal rock-gods who are so bad at learning, they may get expelled. Then a mysterious stranger [George Carlin] arrives in a time-traveling phone booth to help the pair graduate, and thus save the planet.

The original [which we may now only know as 'the good one'] made Keanu Reeves an international name. And Justin will take his part in the remake – if it ever gets made.

Many people say Hollywood is out of ideas. But even though it’s just a rumor, the presence of any serious intent to actually do this movie proves beyond doubt that Hollywood is not lacking ideas, it’s lacking a functional brain-stem.

Remakes are nothing more than thinly-veiled box-office theft, embraced by those so creatively bankrupt they are too lazy to hire people with original ideas. And this appalling, inexcusable and unjustifiable re-hash is another unwelcome example.

Those planning it should be fired and ashamed…

Photo: Roadside Pictures

Text © 2009, The Loquacious Limey
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Justin Bieber set to ruin your childhood with ‘Bill & Ted’ reboot

But of all the clues to be gathered from this glitzy debacle, two stand out above all: Having an original story helps to win the gold man, while beating your audience over the head with disingenuous, self-serving hype demonstrably does not.

Both prior to and since its debut on December 18,  Fox and James Cameron have engaged in a sickening, endless and often clandestine campaign of hype for their $237-million curio, desperately trying to maximize their box-office profits and win the gold man.

And they failed.

Only the art directors, the cinematographer and the geniuses at Wikka Digital with their TRS-80′s took home a prize. James and his tired, plodding and derivative story were rightfully left empty handed.

And the moral of this story is far clearer than the plot of that film; To be successful you need to actually be good at your job. Inept mediocrity inflated by hype does not make a star, or ensure true success.

Many ‘celebrities’ would do well to take notes.

Text © 2009, The Loquacious Limey
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James Cameron’s Avatar deserved Oscar snub

The 36-year old New Yorker will now join Robert Rodriguez’ upcoming retread of Arnold Schwarzenegger’s 1987 jungle-based romp, which Rodriguez is now writing along with some friends.

‘That 70′s Show’s Topher Grace is also debating getting involved, and if the price gets worked out he’ll join Alice Braga, ‘The Shield’s Walt Goggins, Oleg Taktarov, the UFC star, and one of Rob’s favorite actors [and his second cousin,] Danny Trejo.

This time around – who knows how many more there will be?? – the story concerns a group of elite warriors who become unwilling prey to a swarm of alien trackers called Predators. Adrien is the leader, who has a strong rep as a hunter of men. Topher, meanwhile, plays a placid bean-counter, inside of whom lurks a serial killer. Braga – last seen in ‘I Am Legend’ – is a cold-hearted assassin, Goggins will play a radical type and Taktarov will be a Russian Special Ops expert.

And in what sounds like the most fun role of all, 64-year old Trejo will be a merciless warrior who roams the world with two loaded Uzis strapped on his back.

Shooting is penciled-in for Hawaii next month, with interiors, effects shots and green-screening booked to be done at Rodriguez’ ‘Troublemaker Studios’ in Texas. The finished movie is slated to bow on July 9th, 2010.

Photo by Mecredis

Text © 2009, The Loquacious Limey
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Adrien Brody to lead Predator reboot

Originally offered to Nicholas Cage, who declined it last week for reasons unknown, this rightful recasting should implant the 52-year old Vienna-born actor in the Academy’s minds as surely as his pipe-puffing role as Colonel Hans Landa in Quentin Tarrantino’s wartime drama has imprinted his name on a world of new fans.

Based in London, Waltz will now join Seth Rogen and Cameron Diaz on the set of Sony’s, ‘Hornet,’ which is already in production and scheduled to premiere on December 17th.

Text © 2009, The Loquacious Limey
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Christoph Waltz to replace Nicholas Cage in ‘Green Hornet’

Fade out…Fade up – ‘Six Months Later:’ The same desperate has-been whose pubescent tantrum was the first earthly clue most Producers had seen that they were even alive signs up to make ten more movies – for five times the fee!

Well, that’s not the case in this story…So far.

Viggo Mortensen, the hirsute New Yorker whose smoldering presence in Lord of the Rings made legions of female geeks pay attention has declared he’s now semi-retired, “I have no plans to do another movie. I’ll see how I feel in a while, but right now I’m not saying yes to anything. I feel like I’ve taken on too much.”

From his earlier interviews it’s clear that at least part of the problem is the unending travel, and the dent that can put in your health. And it’s not like he lacks other choices – An accomplished musician with three CD’s to his name, Viggo is now promoting his new film, ‘The Road.’ But once that is done his schedule is empty.

And this sudden retirement could cause a real problem: Now the court case is settled, Peter Jackson is due to start shooting a two-volume film adaptation of the Tolkien classic, ‘The Hobbit.’ And Aragorn – Viggo’s character from ‘..Rings’ – is required in part two of those films.

So is this a ploy, or will he be back. The man is not saying, so what is your view?

Photo: Viernest

Text © 2009, The Loquacious Limey
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Viggo Mortensen to retire from acting?

Having grossed $414+ million with ‘Bad Boys’ 1 and 2, the explosion-packed antics of Will Smith and Martin Lawrence as two Miami detectives with a worrying fetish for standing totally still while Michael Bay’s loving camera revolves around them in jaw-cracking slow-mo, Columbia Pictures now want this highly bankable trio to do it again.

The franchise’s 1995 first outing was Bay’s directorial debut, and paired Smith [in his first film role since 'Fresh Prince,'] with the more laid-back Lawrence. The result grossed over $141-million worldwide. 2003′s inevitable sequel saw both Bay and Smith now full-fledged as stars, and hauled in $273-million just on its own.

So now, of course, their bosses want more.

Due to be written by Peter Craig – who wrote ‘The Town,’ which Ben Affleck is now directing in Massachusetts – according to the Hollywood Reporter, everyone involved in the two previous outings is keen to return. But no-one’s signed up yet, so don’t make big plans.

Photo by Decora

Text © 2009, The Loquacious Limey
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Will Smith returning for Bad Boys III?

Bruce Willis, Arnold Schwarzenegger and Sylvester Stallone have now signed to appear on-screen together in the upcoming movie, ‘The Expendables,’ which Sly will also write and direct.

Billed as ‘an ultra-violent action thriller,’ the new flick tells the story of a group of  hard-bitten mercenaries who combine to defeat a vile South American dictator. Helping further their cause are such 80′s bygones as Dolph Lundgren, Stone-Cold Steve Austin and Randy Couture.

Bruce Willis has confirmed to MTV that he will be joining Arnold and Sly to shoot one special scene in which the three biggest ‘action heroes’ in Hollywood history have their first-ever meeting on film, “That’s the concept,” he said with a grin. “I’m just waiting for a call from Sly about when we’re going to make that happen.”

This much-vaunted threesome with Arnie and Sly is scheduled to open on April 25 of next year. Meantime, Bruce’s next bow is the new Sci-Fi feature, ‘Surrogates’, in which he plays a cop [big surprise!] who has to hunt down a killer of robots. It debuts in theaters on September 25.

Text © 2009, The Loquacious Limey
All rights reserved.

Schwarzenegger, Stallone and Bruce Willis team for new film

After the global success of the ‘Star Wars’ reboot, Fox are now working on a prequel to ‘Alien,’ the 1979 Oscar-winning tale that launched Sigourney Weaver’s career…and global insomnia. And Ridley Scott – the original’s director – has agreed to take back the helm.

Unknown writer Jon Spaihts pitched the re-tread to Fox and now has the less than enviable task of crafting the prequel, which according to Variety will once more concern the crew of the freighter, Nostromo. Awakened from interstellar slumber to respond to an automatic distress call the sleep-addled team misread the signal, and land in a whole world of trouble.

Three [awful] sequels were made to cash-in on the box-office bounty of the original film [now widely and rightly regarded as one of the best horror/suspense movies ever made,] but this is the first time that Ridley’s consented to be back in charge.

No production dates or casting details are available yet, but with Ridley on board the wait is worthwhile.

Photo: Alan Light

Text © 2009, The Loquacious Limey
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Alien prequel gets Fox’s green light

“I was stunned by Summit’s decision to recast the role,’” the 30-year old actress told Access Hollywood. Rachelle goes on to explain that she’d turned down ‘several’ roles to be ready for Twilight, and that her new role in ‘Barney’s Version,’ with the great Dustin Hoffman would ‘only’ cause a ten-day delay with her pre-arranged dates for ‘Eclipse.’

“Although the shooting schedule is over three-months long, Summit had a conflict during those ten days and would not accommodate me.” she egocentrically whines. “I am greatly saddened that I will not get to complete my portrayal, and I will forever be grateful for the fan support and loyalty I’ve received since being cast for the role.” her statement concludes.

Meanwhile at Summit, they don’t quite see it that way;

“We are disappointed by Rachelle’s comments, which attempt to make her own choices the fault of the studio,” says the acerbic reply. “Her reps were advised in April that ‘Eclipse’ would start shooting in August. It was not until July 20th that Summit was told of her commitment to ‘Barney’ – which she accepted in early June. Her choice to withhold this information can only be viewed as a lack of cooperative spirit that affected the entire production.”

Think that’s harsh? They’re not done, “Furthermore, the other film places her in Europe during vital rehearsal time, and at least ten days of photography. This time is essential for both rehearsal, and for filming at key locations.”

The studio end their rebuttal with quite evident relish; “It is simply untrue that the studio dismissed her over a 10-day overlap, It is not about an overlap, but that this is an ensemble production which has to accommodate the schedules of numerous actors, while still respecting both the filmmaker and story.”

I don’t know about you, but I’m siding with Summit: A total unknown gets a shot at a part with one of Hollywood’s great leading men – which she only got offered because of being in ‘Twilight’ – and grabs at the chance, egocentrically sure that an entire studio, the rest of the cast [who she claims are her friends,] and a whole crew will rework all the plans she’s known of for months – just to suit her.

‘Twilight: Eclipse’ will start filming on August 17th in Vancouver, Canada, and is timed for release at the end of next June. Maybe by then they can mop up the blood?

Photo: Jurvetson

Text © 2009, The Loquacious Limey
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Twilight actress and studio duel on re-casting